Three of my favourite things in life...drinking booze...trying to stop drinking booze...and dry humping a wet mermaid on a rock in the middle of the sea...the order changes a bit with those three, but those are the three constants...i also like to laugh...a guy came into the place where i work a few weeks ago...i didn't know him from adam or eve but right away he launches into a joke...what's the difference between a pick pocket and a peeping tom?...i shook my head...a pick pocket snatches your watch and a peeping tom watches your snatch!...i laughed and then he flashed me his cock and ran out the store!...jesus, the routines people put down these days and don't even get me started on my neighbour downstairs!...i'm working on a 2 hour stand up routine just on that guy!...anyway just finished RON BERGUNDY'S new memoir...
...pretty fucking funny shit...i pretty much laughed at something on every page...which means i laughed at least 223 times for all you stat nerds out there...nothing wrong with that, unless you like to fucking mean mug it all day like an upside down clown...huh!?...i give this tidy fucking book 3.67 mermaids out of 5 on the telepathic radar of good times...
RON BERGUNDY ON HIMSELF...
RON BERGUNDY ON THE BEST PLACES TO PICK UP...
RON BERGUNDY ON OWNING A BALD EAGLE...
